YO PUNK
“Are you gonna let him let him 
U to death
You move away
But not to far” [1]
Eve,
Oh dear friend you frighten me with those threats to break my knee cap [2]
So I’m writing you back
Too bad our plans got knocked up. We would have had fun. I thought for a while that Joe Perezutti was skipping too, but he’s in school now.
Cause I would be pissed if I didn’t skip. So when are you gonna change your last name to Jims? ha ha ha.
“White trash get down on your knees time for cake and sodomy -
- too much oral defecation” [3]
Well I hope your happy
You’ve gotten me to write you.
Well anyways, (I wish I was a human ashtray) [4]
Tres chic bitches [5] are in the house! I’m only in 4th period and already need a stogie.
So maby we can skip Friday cause then we wouldn’t have to get on the bus in the afternoon, we could just stay after unless youre still grounded. That would suck majorly.
So in conclusion – mommy dearest – I want some lovin – just kidding
This letter’s getting a little long so write or talk later
Francis Bean [6]
Hurling the aerosol cans [7]
Sweet cheeks
This note is laced with in-jokes.
1) Lyrics from the 7 Year Bitch song Icy Blue, featured in the movie Mad Love, which was our absolute favorite movie and model for life at the time.
2) I told Cadence I would break her knee caps if she didn’t write me a note already (her presence was starting to get missed on this blog, too)
3) Lyrics from Marilyn Manson song Cake & Sodomy that Cadence used to recite all the time, which was actually kind of amazing considering the lyrics went like this, “Red-neck-burn-out-mid-west-mind, who said date rape isnt kind?” But pretty soon this rude sophomore girl started a rumor going around that Cadence thought of herself as “the god of fuck”, and people started to come up to her and ask, “So, are you really the god of fuck?”. We decided right then and there that we hated that girl.
4) Some guy said this once while we were all on acid and it immediately became something we would always say to each other, in exactly the inflection he had used, which I don’t know how to translate here. I totally just texted it to her now.
5) Tres chic bitches was how we referred to ourselves, obviously.
6) Since we were banned by our parents from hanging out the year before, Francis Bean - her code name / Courtney - mine.
7) Also the year before, after our semester of metal shop class was over, we broke into the shop building, which was located apart from the main building in the parking lot behind the school and stole all the spray paint (with ambitions to do up the town with our amateur attempts at vandalism). However, that all happened on the same day that I got suspended from school for having a minuscule bag of weed located inside of a Satanic troll mascot so when they finally let me out of the interrogation principal’s office for a bathroom break after the bust, the first thing I did was run to my locker, remove all the cans of spray paint and huuuuuurrrrrled them into a trash can in the girls room as I ran back to the bench I might as well have been handcuffed to, in the office. With the “severity” of what I had just been caught with, six or seven cans of stolen spray paint was the last thing I needed to have discovered in my locker, in case it was searched, which it never actually was. But at least by that point I’d started using my brain… even just that little bit was something.
